So it has been a while… months. The last post was actually written months ago but I didn’t upload it and I can’t remember why I didn’t. Maybe I felt it wasn’t complete. That is so reflective of my nature. It seems like a good practice to only present your optimal self, the most “complete” version. However, are we always truly at that level? Have we formed a society in which no one shows their authentic self? My authentic self is flawed, like others, but hat doesn’t mean that I am not evolving.

When we give our authentic self we will find that others will do the same. Silent suffering and putting on masks is killing people figuratively and literally. Every individual wants an identity… someTHING and someONE to connect to. Discovering who we are and the context in which we are ignites a flame that gives direction to where we are suppose to go.

Find out who you are. Be who you are.



“The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.”

― Mark Twain

Saved. What is that?

Saved. What is that?
Is it the linked chained around my neck, its golden film fading and its crucifix swaying?
Or is it robotically regurgitating the books of the bible in front of the congregation to the chorus of “amens” and “go ‘heads”?
Surely the depths of salvation can be found in the clarity one has in the scriptures and the charity one has towards others.

Don’t forget the fasting and praying prescribed three times daily

It is so much more.

Salvation is simple… it’s love.

Half Way Up The Mountain

I am in conflict with consistency. To achieve any level of excellence consistency has to be present, and increasingly so. However, I find that my daily discipline is on simmer while my sincerity intensely scorches within me. These days I find my self struggling betwixt two extremes; peering into my purpose or conscious mediocrity, the latter is more familiar to me. 


adjective: mediocre
  1. of only moderate quality; not very good.
    Origin: medius ‘middle’ + ocris ‘rugged mountain.


In the beginning, both man and woman beautifully made, walked naked unashamed.

Sometimes I stand before a mirror to examine myself… features I can see with the eye and without. Curious to see who I really am.  After years of socialized layers, it is difficult to not be distracted by the discomfiture. I’m convinced that there are not many who completely uncover themselves. It requires too much thinking, searching, revisiting. Too much time. However, is this not what God seeks? For me to walk before Him unashamed and un-cloaked? Every desire revealed; the only covering is that of a translucent ‘deep blood red’ of the sacrifice for redemption. Ever encompassed and lead by His voice, unafraid yet aware of my nakedness. Fear comes with what is hidden, sincere and sacred exposure indicates intimacy. Today I choose to lay down the leaves that I thought could camouflage my sin and insecurities, and vulnerably walk into the centerfold repentant, converted, and bare. Clay ready to be formed again.

Amanda Louise





References- Genesis 1-3

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